discretion is a must.

Missed Connections M4W. New York, NY

One time I was on a date with a guy who asked me to tell him something really embarrassing about myself.  I think what I ended up admitting was pretty outrageous because he didn’t actually believe me (it was true!) and now looking back, I probably should have gone with a tamer reveal like the fact I check missed connections daily. Also mildly embarrassing – I came very close to responding to this:

I want a woman who will scratch my head – m4w – 29 (Manhattan)
That’s it. Seriously… I am happily married but my wife has this thing where running her fingers through my hair and scratching my head is like fingers on a chalkboard for her. So I am seeking a woman to fulfill this simple yet intimate pleasure I desire. I can return the favor with a killer massage or just some good company/conversation. I am smart, handsome, with an interesting job in the entertainment field. I am not interested in a relationship or even sex. I know this sounds a little crazy… but hit me with an email/pic if you’re interested. Discretion is a MUST.
Thanks, WA

seduction slash arts.

Slash: Paper Under the Knife. New York, NY

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Two weeks ago I met this guy (for anonymity’s sake let’s call him “Charles”) and his friend Wayne at my go-to East Village coffee shop Mudspot.  After a brief exchange with Charles, he asked if I had a boyfriend and then for my number.  I hesitated aloud – which sounds a lot like “ummmmmm” – as I calculated his percentage of crazy {high % = definite no due to possibility of physical danger, low % = okay to oblige and defer looking like a cynical city bitch until later}.  Charles fell in the latter percentile and managed, despite my lackluster attempts to ignore his text, phone call, and voicemail, to convince me to travel above 42nd Street to check out Slash: Paper Under the Knife at MAD the following weekend.  As I predicted:  great exhibit, good conversation, zero attraction.
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And then something I couldn’t have possibly predicted:
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After mulling over some of the stranger moments of the date later that day (comments like “I wouldn’t exactly call Wayne a friend” and “We both thought hesitating before giving out your number was a great move!”), I decided to do a little research and quickly discovered that Wayne is actually Wayne Elise, a professional within the seduction community who gets paid to teach people the dynamics of effective conversation with strangers (ie how to pick up women).  He’s also a contributing author of “The Game.”
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ummmmmm. ….{low %}
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As it turns out, not only is his philosophy very well regarded within this community, it’s also kind of brilliant.  Here’s an mp3 of Wayne giving a seminar in Irvine, CA on April 26, 2007.

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anthony bourdain is totally my [lino]type.

As if Anthony Bourdain could get any hotter, he has to go and print this on the very last page of Kitchen Confidential:.

A NOTE ON THE TYPE

The text of this book is set in Linotype Sabon, named after the type founder, Jacques Sabon.  It was designed by Jan Tschichold and jointly developed by Linotype, Monotype and Stempel, in response to a need for a typeface to be available in identical form for mechanical hot metal composition and hand composition using foundry type.

Tschichold based his design for Sabon roman on a fount engraved by Garamond, and Sabon italic on a fount by Granjon.  It was first used in 1966 and has proven an enduring modern classic.

Holy shit, Bourdain.
Sex, drugs, alcohol, food, and fonts?
Do me.  Okay, thanks.

that’s ms. suave to you.

me: i wish i was Rico Suave but with dudes
Dobies: ummm you are remember how many people meet you and are like wow i want to sleep with her but i’m going to make it really complicated and weird for her to do that?

Oh, right.  My bad.

a pro con list.

PRO:
when lawyers reply to my emails with, “perfect amy.”

CON:
when older men text me with emoticons  :(