Probably Not Your Sister. JOLIE MA
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I’m currently having this exchange repeatedly:
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Dude says: ..My name is Dude.
Amy says: ..Hi, Dude! I’m Amy.
Dude says: ..My sister’s name is Amy.
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I don’t understand. Straight man – straight woman introductions are supposed to be for sizing each other up to see if our faces might like to smush together later and you’re telling me that I remind you of your sister? I’m not sure what you want me to say. Cool? Awesome? Let’s all hang out sometime and try not to get confused which one of us you’re talking to?
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Not to mention, I’m pretty sure my childhood fantasies about the gloriousness of having a brother were entirely accurate (sorry, Jenny), so basically you’re asking me to compete against the bonds of I kinda want to slap you all the time but then again I might let you meet some of my extremely attractive friends and don’t tell anyone but I’ll probably protect and love you forever-ness. Despite how fabulous this uphill battle where I try to be check plus awesome only to forever lag behind your blood sister who is also named Amy seems to be, I think my face and I are going to pass. Thanks!
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Oh and, I really feel like this goes without saying, but no one used to have my name. Besides the music teacher who we all called Mrs. Luke, I was the only Amy in my whole middle school. How is suddenly everyone named Amy? And how do they all have really nice brothers?
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I….M..E..A..N….,….R..E..A..L..L..Y…..
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