ooh rexy, you’re soo . . .

Fabexy. One of Mine

I am just now realizing that aimlessly wandering EVERY AISLE of my hometown video store as a tweenasaur (heygirlhey mishawaka hollywood video) was a totally epic waste of my money considering I always left with the same five fucking films EVERY TIME:
1. For Love or Money
2. Drop Dead Fred
3. History of the World: Part 1
4. Blazing Saddles
5. Empire Records
Why didn’t I see the trend and just buy them on VHS?!
I could have saved up for coolshit I really wanted!
Man, this is tragic. Like, really tragic:
I would have been able to buy maybe a dozen novelty key chains from Claire’s or like an entire portfolio of Glamour Shots® or, ohmygodshutup, the trampoline hanging from the ceiling at Sam’s Club.  Wooaaah, Rod Stewart was sooo right:

I wish
I knew
I know
i was