unsolicited life advice (ny)

you are a prisoner
1...whatever your walking pace is, speed it up by 20%. if you need to stop, step out of the way.
2...pedestrians run the show so cross like a boss, whether or not you have the right of way.
3...get your metrocard out ahead of time, black strip facing inwards. swipe it like an amex.
4...new york is really fucking expensive and we don’t talk about it so … try not to talk about it.
5...talking about your broker’s fee or how much you pay in rent, however, is totally acceptable.
6...buy smart / weather appropriate clothes that make you feel smart / weather appropriate.
7...do things by yourself as much as possible even if you have a +1 or already know people.
8...i’m serious. go to restaurants by yourself. wander around by yourself. get lost by yourself.
9...make personal business cards. no … not shitty ones. nice ones. heavy ones. letterpress.
10...fold your pizza.